*pictures with our point-n-shoot as my lens on my nikon is busted; my computer is still being fixed… therefore grainy, blurry, unedited pictures for the time being.
i am standing on the roof tops and shouting hurrah!
today was the first day in a long time that my bear and i did not fight. i made big (and i mean BIG) efforts not fall for his antics and i succeeded. there were a few close calls, but i would close my eyes, count to ten and ask for “serenity now”. i’ve said it before and i will say it again, i am the adult in this relationship and it is my responsibility to model the behaviour i want him to present. three has been a super difficult age for us and most parents out there tend to agree. whoever came up with the “terrible twos” notion, obviously moved out before the kid turned three.
there is something very fundamentally different about three and two and three and four. a two year old is still very much a baby in so many ways, especially compared to a three year old. after speaking with the experts, mamas and papas like me, i think at three they get scared of growing up. at our house it seems as though bear is aware of his advances in learning and the gains he has made in his independence and that recently he has regressed to a baby. for example, when trying to get out the door bear says he doesn’t know how to put his shoes on, which i know is ridiculous, because he was eagerly velcroing his runners at two. my frustration comes from knowing he knows how to do things, but him choosing not to do them.
so today was my experiment day, i knelt down to his level and helped him get dressed in way and with a tone i haven’t in a long time. he is so very capable of getting dressed on his own, except for those darn socks and tricky buttons and has even been choosing his own clothes to wear each day. but today, instead of insisting that he do it and him refusing vehemently, i gave him the opportunity to it on his own, but when things were not progressing instead of getting frustrated, i sat on the floor and gently asked if he wanted help. i probably sound like a cow and a terrible mother, for A) caving in B) usually getting frustrated with getting dressed. but, i think parents of three year olds will agree and i hope you are nodding as you read this, because you have perhaps struggled the way i have, and still do.
i don’t feel as tired as i usually do on a weekday evening. the positive turn of events i think have recharged my mama-batteries and turned a light on at the end of this long parenting tunnel.
fingers crossed tomorrow is a calm and joy filled day as well.