lion dancing!

we have had a rough week of sickness, pain and late nights. bear developed a ear infection at the beginning of the week, which made his life miserable for a few days. his ear drum actually ruptured the night before our doctor’s appointment… poor lamb. he is now on antibiotics and finally back at school, bit those long days at home were awful for him. and for me. watching your child in pain is such a helpless, horrible feeling.

so, i decided to share some fun and cute pictures from lion’s dance class to end the week on a happier note. our lion started taking dance classes in the new year. he goes with a friend every saturday afternoon and works his body hard. he is always completely exhausted when he gets home! so great!

check-out these absolutely adorable photo’s of my guy dancing away!

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i just love that my boys will dance without any worries that it’s a girly thing to do. lion is so full of joy when at his class clearly enjoying moving his body in all sorts of different ways!

i of course looked like such a dork when watching; i had a goofy grin on my face as i tried to take photo’s while also enjoying the moment. i kept giggling and looking over at DH to see if he was taking in all of the cuteness like i was! and, no worries as he was!

i was the same when bear took dance classes a few years ago, you can see photos from back then HERE.

 

happy friday to you!

xo, mama lola

just call me diaper head.

i am the mother of two boys. with that comes a certain amount of daily conversation around penises, watching the kids stick their hands down their pants and let’snot forget about bum wiping! it all comes with the job and i get it!

[source]


but, now we have entered a new world of poop talk.
since starting school and more specifically since around christmas bear, my 5YO, says the word poo probably a million times a day. there are songs that he sings with only the word poo as lyrics. and, he targets his little brother with these words and rhymes and songs, in a taunting tone. i hear lion trying to stand up for himself shouting “no, me no poo, me a kid”. i cheer loudly for him in my head and think right on little lion! but, bear just keeps on going.

he repeats sentences like these every chance he gets..

you’re a diaper head.
you’re poopy baby poo.
you’re a baby diaper poo head.
poo-poo-poopy poo head.

i realize it is age appropriate, but i find this kind of talk absolutely exhausting to have to listen, because he never turns it off. bear has tried to bring the poo talk to the dinner table, but that’s where i’ve laid down the law, say the word once and it’s straight to bed. it works. but, then he starts with the name calling and poo talk as soon as he’s been excused from the table.

[source]

we’ve tried threats, ignoring it, taking away bed time stories, you name it, but it just keeps going on and on. i’ve asked around and some of his friends do it too, but not quite to the same degree.

the worst things about this poop talk is that now lion is slowly jumping onto the bandwagon! aaahhhhhh! this cannot be happening!!!!!

what have you done with your kids when they went through this phase???
HELP ME!!?!



xo, mama lola

who knew, Charlie’s Angels speak Finnish?

as i was perusing pinterest i came across this video below, found HERE. to me, it is one of the funniest things i have ever seen and heard! it was a well deserved chuckle, as i go in for another follow up MRI on a couple of hours. my stomach is in knots; the nerves never go away. i wish i knew what was happening in there….
wish me luck!
tumour free vibes only, please!
xo, mama lola

guns n’ boys n’ stuff.

what exactly does “boys will be boys” mean?
does it mean that boys have an innate tendency towards violence?  because, that saying is often heard after someone sees boys playing roughly, mischievously or violently. nobody ever says the same about girls.


dear hubby and i have a rule about certain toys not being welcome in our home, basically guns and swords. guns scare me, a lot, and i don’t think they are an appropriate toy for my boys to play with. from all of the reading we did on this, and there is TONS of stuff out there, our decision was a natural extension of our (parenting) values. we are pacifists, our kids don’t have water guns and don’t wear anything camo; both are very conscious choices we have made for our children.  that being said, we are not against pretend games or imaginative play where violence is a major player.


kids, including our boys, want to push boundaries, feel powerful, and yearn to discover their own world view, and if violence is a part of that play and exploration, i think that’s ok. 

violence is every where around us. i grew up watching various BBC nature shows with david attenborough. remember those from the 80’s? he taught me that the natural world is full of violence, killing, torture and survival; good guys against the bad guys; the hunter versus the hunted. exploring one’s place in all of this is expected. right?


but, and this is a big but…
war, is not a game. it is something so awful, i don’t want my kids to ever even imagine being involved in one. guns were created with one intention in mind: to kill. that is their only purpose and that’s why we don’t allow anything resembling one in our house or in our play. 


i do struggle with where to draw the line. how much violence is too much? are fingers pointed like guns and aimed at others ok, well, i’m not sure. and, how much “rough housing” should i tolerate before calling it quits?

stuff to read on this, HERE and HERE

where do you draw the line with your kids of any gender?

[ the pictures are from our hot day at the beach today. the kids built this interesting piece of architecture with the help of some older kids they befriended. such a fun day! we’re all tired from the sun! and to end the day on a high note, lion pooped in the potty for the first time, completely on his own initially. we did have to encourage him finish the task once he had started! ]

xo, mama lola
Do not speak unless it improves on silence. ~ Proverb

i can be heard yimmering on at the kids and dear hubby. i think i use too many words with them, as often what i am trying to convey gets lost in all the words. i read a parenting book a while ago, on the recommendation of a dear friend, the way of boys by anthony rao. a worthwhile read for anyone, but especially if you have a little guy around 3 years of age. in the book the author really makes a point about communicating well with your kids. short and concise is best. since reading the book, my talking has changed with bear specifically. i try and stick to the point without too many words, especially when i want him to do something like wash his hands before dinner, or tidy up his toys. 
bear yawns as an answer to a question and then completely ignores me.
mr. mischievous always going after my computer.
he knows he’s not supposed to touch my laptop, but he doesn’t care.

i am chatty. i like to talk, but i also like to listen. i enjoy a good conversation greatly, but have recently come to terms with the realization that bear is not chatty like me. he is more introverted, more quiet and subtle with his communicating, just like his dad. i have resigned asking about pre-school on the drive home as these one sided conversations only end up frustrating me. so, instead of sharing our morning experiences, we sit silently listening to the radio, each of us in our own worlds.

maybe with age this will change. maybe not.
lion, i think, will be my conversation partner.

Once a word has been allowed to escape, it cannot be recalled.  ~ Horace


there are times when i am so exhausted and feel so beat down by the world, that not only do i say too many words, but i let the regrettable ones slip out too. those are the darkest and most shameful occasions of my parenting. i recognize that i am the adult, the parent, and should therefore, be setting the example of how to treat others with respect and care. there are no excuses and there is no justification, and all i can do is pick myself up from these low places and remind myself that next time i will try to handle things better. because, there will be a next time. you see, the life i lead is based on cycles and rhythms and with two little people in my life i am bound to be tested and pushed for many more years to come.
i cannot take back what i have said, but i can teach my children how to acknowledge and take responsibility for something hurtful they have said to someone. that is a tough lesson to learn and definitely a skill most adults should work on. it’s embarrassing to hold yourself accountable, but it’s mortifying to do it in front of your child. but i do it, because i have to take ownership of my mistakes and ask for forgiveness. right? how will i become a better mother, better person, if i can’t call myself on my own s#!t. 
don’t stand on the rocking chair!
it will be difficult to push the cart if you are standing on it.

i feel nervous about sharing this info with the world. but, i think parenting is full of dirty secrets that we are encouraged to hide in shame. this is my attempt to open up the dialogue and shatter the façades that parents don’t say terrible things to their kids. 


we all do it, but we just don’t talk about it.




xo, mama lola

http://bearandlionmama.com/2011/05/525.html

gibberish.

my bear speaks in gibberish. it wouldn’t be such a big deal and worth writing about if the kid wasn’t so bloody annoying with it. he talks in gibberish to everyone and it is especially annoying when i am trying to get some information from him. for example, “do you want milk or water with dinner” and in response i hear “ablibaba digadogy”. i know, i know he’s three and this behaviour is normal and it too will pass and he’ll outgrow and forget all about it. i know he’s probably looking for a reaction from me and pushing my buttons or he’s regressing as his baby brother speaks in baby talk and we all respond as though we understand.


it’s frustrating because bear is very articulate. when he talks in english his vocabulary is extensive; i say this with obvious bias in mind but, others have also commented on his language skills. his finnish is not strong and that’s my fault (insert a million kilos of mother’s guilt here). but back to the gibberish… i’m not really sure what to do about it. it is infuriating when i am trying to talk to him or ask him something and i hear “are you bilagie sihd bibibibib-ta?”. argh: hear mama roar! and the weird thing is, he doesn’t use random sounds, it’s like he’s made his own language as he makes the same sounds over and over again, which eventually we have come to recognize.

we adore window markers. we have one of those all glass storm doors and have been trying to use the cool, rainy days creatively. drawing and colouring are two activities that bear loves, and on this creative afternoon lion did some serious bold strokes with a yellow marker! so fantastic!


and after the rain…

… the glorious sun was out all day warming and shining down on us. we took full advantage of this weather phenomenon and spent most of the day outside. we even left dirty lunch dishes in the sink to be dealt with later! this spring has been very wet and rainy, so it’s been hard to get outside. now, don’t get all “if you dress them right” on me, because yes, we have rain gear and do go out in the rain, but it’s hard because of my non-walking, shuffling around on his butt lion. the rain is difficult for him to manage. so, today we played hard in the sun making up for lost outdoor time!

pasta lunch!

bear is going though a fire fighter stage. he has been playing fire fighter at home, building trucks out of furniture and pillows. i am often told i am a fire fighter as well. bear’s imaginative play is exploding right now, so it was fun today to go and check out some local emergency vehicles on display at the rec centre. it was really hard to take pictures as lion was in the sling, but here is one with the local electrical vehicle and bear standing proudly with his fire chief helmet on. so cute! he was terrified of the actual fire truck and when he was asked if he wanted to check out the inside he panicked. oh well, next time! 

if anyone has any earth shaking ideas on how to get over this darn gibberish phase, please share your wisdom with me. i am losing my mind and cool.
thanks.
xo, mama lola
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