as inspired by souleMama; one photo from our week, no words, only an image to sum up our time as a family. one that captures a moment in time and is a visual reminder of where we were at this time in our lives.Â
i would love it if you left a link to your { this moment }.Â
my mothering is changing pace. the boys are growing so quickly, which means their needs and my time can be used differently.
i have been slowly, but carefully purging, purging, purging through our things. i have wiped away many tears as i have sorted through several large tote bins of baby items, deciding what to sell, what to pass along and what to keep. the toys are easy to get rid of. the clothes, not so much. i know exactly where to sell them – craigslist, ebay, depop etc – and there’s even a depop automation tool to help get faster sales on that particular platform – but it’s the memories associated with those clothes that’s making me so emotional to even think about letting them go.
it takes a while to purge, as i look at the clothes, hold them, touch them to my cheek, remembering each of my boys wearing these tiny sleepers and onesies so many moons ago. it is so hard to remember accurately those hazy, baby days. and, i think that’s how it’s supposed to be, because although there are so many wonderful moments of firsts and unbearable cuteness, the sleepless nights, bouts of teething and gas issues, the awful bum rashes and epic amounts of laundry i did in those days, was quite simply exhausting. and, quite frankly not worth remembering.
my days felt never ending, long and often quite lonely.
and, then all of a sudden we were out of baby-hood and in the throws of kid-hood. we are done with teething and diapering, never to have to endure those constant sleepless nights with a fussy baby, taking turns pacing and me trying to breastfeed in those dark, quiet hours of the night again.
i did try to drink up the time with my babies; i would stare at the details of their tinyness; the folds of skin, the eye lashes that went on forever and the fingers that gripped mine so tightly. i tried to enjoy the quiet moments, even if they were short lived.
our awesome bumbleride queen B stroller is still sitting in the basement. i am so unsure what to do with it. we used the heck out of, especially when bear was little. i love that stroller and was so pleased with it’s purchase. i didn’t drive when bear was born, so this stroller got us everywhere safely and efficiently. i called it my SUV, because it has four large rubber tires chosen to help navigate through the snowy winters of canada. now, all the strollers have them, but 6 years ago we paid a lot of money for those big ol’ tires! I do remember all of the stress that came with looking and buying a stroller like this though. It took us ages to find one that would fit our needs, especially the need of being able to travel to different places without having a lot of hassle. We came across this joovy double stroller that we loved! But then we realized we wouldn’t be having twins so we had to reevaluate our choices. That double stroller looked really good though as you could detach car seats from them, so it would’ve been brilliant had we needed to travel anywhere by transport. Eventually, though, we feel in love with the one we picked, so I’ll be sad when the time comes that we won’t need to use it anymore.
we also done with slings, wraps and other carriers. i spent hours and hours of my life carrying someone on my side, front or back! my body ached at the end of the day, but again, i am glad i endured.
it feels as though we have survived and conquered the first stage of parenting. i am proud of the parenting choices we made. especially the co-sleeping, cloth diapering and extending breastfeeding. although, in hind-sight i think i should have allowed myself some more leeway considering i had a tumour in my head and then eventually had to recover from that surgery. but, my beliefs were so strong about the kind of parent i wanted to be, that veering away from them felt selfish. those early years are so brief and short lived, that i couldn’t say “oh, when i am feeling more energized i will breastfeed more”.
today, i have a three year old and five year old. my kids are doing awesome and i am finally feeling as though we have found peace at our house. the boys have transitioned into the new school/ pre-school routine so smoothly, which is kind of unheard of at our house. and, because my worry for them has decreased i have been able to think about myself more. which, is empowering and wonderful!
i can finally exhale from those tense, busy, exhausting baby days and get ready for mothering these early childhood days, which i’m sure will be just as exhausting, just different!
aaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
what stage are you at in your mothering/ parenting?
as inspired by souleMama; one photo from our week, no words, only an image to sum up our time as a family. one that captures a moment in time and is a visual reminder of where we were at this time in our lives.Â
(these terrible pictures were taken with my phone. the terry fox run happened at our school and i had to share these stickers on the kids backs. the students decided what they wanted written on their sticker. breaks my heart; but so proud of all of the kids for taking part.)
i would love it if you left a link to your { this moment }.Â
i realize summer is a distant memory at this point, but i just wanted to share some photo’s from the last leg of our trip.
to read about the first part go HERE.
to read about the second part go HERE.
to read about the third part go HERE.
so, after a quick play at a park and a picnic lunch it was time to head to manitoulin island from sault saint marie.
with the pedal to the metal within speed limit restrictions, of course, we drove down and east along the trans-canada highway. it was an easy drive without any traffic problems. we arrived at the bridge leading on to the island. and, we had to wait. the bridge swings open once an hour to allow boats through.
we arrived in the town of little current, and scrambled to find accommodations. eventually we found a hotel looking over the harbour, which was fine, but the bar downstairs had a band playing till the wee hours of the morning! the kids and dear hubby slept through the cover bands renditions of sweet child o’mine among other 80’s hits!
we walked down to the marina checked out the boats and ate ice cream, cuz that’s what you do in the summer, right?
manitoulin island hosts a large pow wow each summer. it was a hot day, but we enjoyed the performances and dancing fully. look at these awesome headdresses and regalia worn by people from various nations and tribes.
we savoured time with our friends, friends who came all the way from germany! the kids played and played and laughed and laughed. we roasted marshmallows, drank some boozy drinks, chatted about kids, world politics and everything in between! we camped with them at a funny little private trailer park for a couple of nights.
this is how i will remember manitoulin island. bright blue skies, rolling fields and peace.
we found a fun flea market.
we found a wonderful, tiny museum on a rainy afternoon.
before leaving the island, we found a funny little beach and went for one last road trip swim. we explored the reeds and enjoyed a picnic lunch.
and then the finale… the chi-chee! the chi cheemaun was the perfect way to end our epic summer road trip! the chi cheemaun is a ferry that goes from manitoulin island to the tip of the bruce peninsula and docks in owen sound. it’s about a two hour trip each way. we arrived early for the ferry; first we parked the van to line up for the ferry, then we went walking around the area, exploring a lighthouse, having lunch and just savouring the last hours of our trip together.
now, we are already planning for our next destination!
i would love it if you left a link to your { this moment }.Â
this year is just flying by. it’s hard to believe it’s already mid-september!Â
i started the year with lots of goals and changes in mind, and i made bunch of new years resolutions in january, but i guess i mostly forgot about them. or at least the specifics. or maybe not.
as always, it is difficult to myself a priority in the day to grind and i’m still working on those always important self care details of my life. but, i am proud of myself for making larger efforts, setting clear boundaries with the kids about my availability; i am fine saying to them i can’t do that right now, you will have to wait. it is easier to set these small boundaries with them because they are older and more independent. plus, with lion in preschool a couple times a week and bear in senior kindergarten, i do have a small handful of hours in the week where i am totally alone. kid free!
during these quiet hours i can feel a stirring inside of me. it’s a feeling that i want to do something big for myself…
i started my women’s studies degree six years ago. (oh, it sounds just horrible to say that, and not be done!) then we got married and bear was born. i continued my studies when he was a wee dude and i put my studies on hold two months before lion was born. it astounds me that while i was massively pregnant, i commuted about 30 minutes each way to my classes, completed my readings, wrote exams, completed essays, all while mothering a two year old and with a tumour growing in my head!Â
clearly i had to put my studies on hold when lion was a newborn and, while having to deal with my health concerns. and inevitably my education was placed way at the bottom of the priority list. this was the right thing to do at that time in my life, but now i am starting to feel a strong urge to finish what i started.Â
to finish my degree.
get ‘er done!
but, the university where i began my women’s studies degree has since discontinued the program (patriarchy at it’s finest!) and figuring out my current options is tricky. it’s not like i have time to sit on the phone and call around making appointments with various universities or what-have-you. but, after some soul searching and real consideration of what i want to do, i think i am closer to a final decision. this time, i am making a decision purely based on me, my needs and my wants. it’s time for my dear hubby and the boys to make some sacrifices too, and honestly, i wouldn’t be asking much of them, or anything they wouldn’t be willing to do for me. they will all support me in their own way, i know it!
next september i will have two kids, so all of my kids in school full-time. that frees up my days and my life significantly. don’t get me wrong, i LOVE being a mama, and i love being home with my kids, but that doesn’t mean i can’t want more for myself.
right?
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| sitting around thinking about life. my life. |
i would love it if you left a link to your { this moment }.Â
i have been meaning to sit down and write about my littlest guy, but with all this back to school business, it’s been hard to find time. when your whole life turns into looking at a Child care finder, it can be quite a struggle to find the time to constantly be writing, especially when you have found so many great preschools. I did some research, and there are so many great preschools out there, I even looked at some of the best preschools in california.
but, new chapters have started up this september for lion. he is 3 years old now and started at his new montesorri preschool last week. i was a little nervous, because i didn’t want to push him into anything he wasn’t ready for. and, i was remembering the tears his older brother shed at those dreaded drop-off’s in the morning when he was in preschool. bear always clung to my thighs and had a hard time acclimatizing; apparently he didn’t talk for the first few months!
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| mandatory first day of school picture! lion was a little tired. |
that being said, i wanted to at least provide lion an opportunity to have something of his own in his life. our life is quite busy with bear’s school; drop-off’s, pick-up’s, committee things, and so on.
i was quite nervous on lion’s first day. we had to drop off bear at his first day of senior kindergarten, before we could get to preschool. lion and i packed his backpack with a few important items before leaving the house. this step was very important to him, especially since his big brother was lending him his old backpack. and, big kids have backpacks, not babies.
so, we arrived at the school, walked in to the school hand-in-hand with dear hubby and lion just walked into his classroom, all non-chalantly, and he waved good bye! he was so eager to start playing with his new friends that saying good-bye was completely forgotten! i called him back for a quick hug and a kiss, then off he went. no tears, no apprehension, no anxiety, no worries! at least not from him.
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| standing proudly in front of the cubbies! |
i on the other hand, went into what oprah called the “ugly cry”. i sobbed and sobbed in the car, tears streaming down my cheek. i was bursting with pride, but also feeling the bittersweet twinges of reality : my kids were growing faster than i could keep up!
two-and-a-half hours later when i went to pick up lion, he was all smiles! he gave me a huge hug with a sloppy wet kiss! he was excited to tell me about his morning, and i was so thrilled to share this moment with him. he sounded so mature, well as mature as a three year old can, as he told me about the puzzles he worked on and the painting he painted. the best part was that i could see that he was feeling proud and good about himself for enjoying his first morning at preschool!
i’m not sure if i could feel more proud of him!
how did your first days back at school go?
this is part three of out epic summer road trip!
we left thunder bay proper in the peeing rain, and headed to the sleeping giant provincial park where we hoped to camp for a few nights. on our way we stopped at ouimet canyon as per a recommendation from a friend. we layered up and headed to the canyon.
the scientists and other experts aren’t actually sure how this amazing canyon was made; there are several hypothesis out there, but nothing is completely agreed upon. it is stunning, breathtaking and frightening! we were so high up looking down at the canyon floor, and i had to remind myself a million times we were safe up on the look-out platform.
the rain finally tapered off just as we arrived at our camp site on the sleeping giant. we were right by the water, which entertained the kids for hours!
apparently the sleeping giant peninsula is highly populated with, um, skunks! we found this out the first night we were there. just as dusk was settling in, i decided to head to the bathroom one last time. as i arrived i thought i saw something out of the corner of y eye and so i shone my flashlight at the shaking grass and to my horror a skunk looked right back at me! i ran! i ran and giggled nervously to myself. i arrived at camp to tell dear hubby my funny story, but then to my horror, again, i saw another skunk… ON OUR CAMPSITE! my nervous giggle returned as i tried to keep my flashlight directed at the skunk. the skunk who was sniffing around under our picnic table and the slowly made its way towards our tent! AAAHHH!!! the kids were fast asleep in the tent, completely oblivious to the stinky dangers creeping around outside. my imagination was running wild with all of the possible ways a skunk could spray a person, their car and belongings, and the unimaginable outcome of this horrifying meeting. then, more skunks arrived. they were sniffing around at our campsite, our neighbours and all over. apparently, that’s the norm there!!!! how did we not know this?!?!
anyhow, after about 30 minutes of following the skunks with my flashlight and giggling nervously, dear hubby decided we needed to just get in our tent and go to sleep. clearly the skunks were used to people and not scared of us, and unlikely to spray us. i thought he was mad, but also right. so, that’s what we did! i lay there wide awake for a while listening to my family sleep soundly, half expecting to be sprayed by critters outside.
we survived the sleeping giant without ever being sprayed by the skunks! woohoo, what a relief!
after a two nights of skunks, a day at the beach, several deer sightings it was time to head south again on the trans-canada highway. we still had a long trip ahead of us and we were excited for more adventures.
our next stop was neys provincial park. this was by far my favourite beach. it was stunning with the driftwood, rock, grass and trees. the kids played and played, but it was too cold for a real swim! we enjoyed a beautiful evening at our campsite, it was calm and quiet. dear hubby checked the weather report and to our dismay heavy rain and thunderstorms were coming our way. so, we packed up as much as we could, got some clothes ready for the following day, and hoped we at least would have a dry night.
the next morning i woke up suddenly to rumbling thunder in the distance. i elbowed dear hubby awake and we got to work. we quickly changed the kids and ourselves into slightly warmer clothes, plonked the boys into the car and raced to pack up our sleeping bags and tent before the rain started. just as we were shoving the last things into the car the downpour came. it was only 7am and we hadn’t had breakfast. so, we decided to drive to the closets town, which was marathon, to see what we could find to eat.
we found a hilarious place called robin’s. it looked like it was stuck in time, like 1975! the orange and brown decor was overwhelming so early in the morning, but we were happy to eat something warm in a dry place!
the weather continued to be wet and cold. we drove in the downpour trying to come with a plan. we stopped in wawa for lunch and a pee. the kids were feeling the long drive, so we needed to stop for a while. the day was still early, so we decided to drive straight to sault saint marie, stay in a hotel and then drive to manitoulin island the following day. i am surprised how well the kids managed on this leg of the drive. because the weather was wet, we couldn’t just stop and have a quick game of tag at a rest area.
eventually, we found an awesome hotel in the soo, with comfy beds, a nice restaurant and a POOL! it was a great way to end the day letting off some steam, playing in the pool, especially since it was still raining really hard outside!
the following morning was bright and sunny!
we headed straight to manitoulin island! more pictures and stories from the final leg of our trip coming up soon!
i know many kids have already returned back to school. my eldest goes back next week, and to prepare i have collected some healthy, fun lunch ideas! my bear gets easily distracted from eating, so i’m hoping if i change things up a little and create little fun surprises, then maybe he’ll be more inclined to eat. we’re vegetarian and his school is a nut-free, waste-free zone, meaning there are certain foods i’m not allowed to include in his lunch and we need to use a steel lunch box to reduce product waste. i’m not bothered by this because i’m very conscious of dietary issues and always do my bit for the environment! anyway, i want to make sure he’s getting everything he needs in a day with these restrictions in place!
i guess only time will tell!
how do you get your kids to eat their school lunches?
it’s so easy to always make the same thing for lunch. i love these ideas, because it shows that if you think a little out of the box you can really get creative!
here’s what to think about:
sooooooooooooooo…. here we go!
may the force be with you bento box from wendolomania
healthy choices from i pack lunch
vegan club sandwich from healthy. happy. life.
roasted tomato grilled cheese from the wimpy vegetarian
slow roasted tomato basil and hummus wraps from oh my veggies
falafel & tzatziki from peas and thank-you
pizza pops from bear & lion
vegan sweet potato, coconut milk and sweet chili ravioli from  reclaiming provincial
christmas cactus from organized bites
