monday blah’s…

August 27, 2012 by mama lola

i watched half of “eat, pray, love” last night. i got to where she arrives in bali. the movie isn’t horrible. it’s just kinda blah and frustrating, because (thus far) it hasn’t really gone any where. i love the concept behind it; a woman travelling the world alone, finding herself (without a man), learning new languages, meeting new people and so on. but, the movie lacks any realism. the places she visits all look squeaky clean and too perfect and the people, well, they’re perfect too and none have any dimension to them. everyone and everything is flat. it all looks like a set designer or a make-up artist just touched things up, which i’m sure they just did! but i hate seeing it so obviously in my face! i haven’t read the book, and probably won’t.

hollywood needs to back off the whole perfection ideal and let a few eye brow hairs stray or a pimple blossom into a shiny whitehead, right?

it rained today and the kids got batty. lion has been crying off and on all day. i’m guessing it’s teeth related, but listening to his over the top dramatics is exhausting. doesn’t help that bear has been antagonizing his brother as well.
i feel grumpy.

i’m not interested in making dinner at all tonight, but we did some grocery shopping this morning and our cupboards are full of beautiful, seasonal foods, so i must create something delicious for the dudes.
corn? and burgers? green salad?
done.

*******

i’ll be participating in NaBloPoMo via blog her this september. it means i will be blogging daily, hopefully. the theme for the month will be “eye“, which i think will be fitting as the upcoming month is filled with new experiences for us. let’s see, we’ll be starting full time school, swimming classes for bear, new daily routines, full on toilet training for lion (he started on his own in the beginning of summer, but with our trip and such we got side tracked), and us parentals will be going forth with various projects around the house and pursuing our own hobbies.
good times!

it’s an honour just to be nominated!

August 24, 2012 by mama lola

i had some exciting news waiting for in my inbox the other day. this little thing that we call the internet, that has enabled me to blog away here at bear & lion, has opened up a whole new world of cyber-connections and cyber-friendships. boy-o-boy am i proud and excited to announce that i have been nominated for my first blogging award, all thanks to always generous and kind, dilovely. she’s become one those a fore mentioned cyber-friends, whose blog is always so interesting to read; she writes about movies, her family, kids, politics, being a teacher… it’s all there!

so, here’s how this whole thing works, the rules to follow are…

Display the Nomination logo on your blog
Link back to the person who nominated you
State 7 things about yourself
Nominate 15 others and link to them
Notify those bloggers of the nominations & award requirement

so, let’s see, logo posted (check), linked back to the person who nominated me (check) i am now on rule #3; i will list 7 things about myself.

i love to make lists. i make to-do lists, vacation packing lists, grocery lists, lists for dear hubby… i make lists for most occasions as it helps keep me on track.
i am a mover and a shaker. after living in one location for a year or so, i start to feel antsy and want to move somewhere new. it all started with a childhood filled with moves within a community, but also several international moves. and as an adult, i have kept up that trend of moving, moving moving from city to city and country to country!
i have pea sized extra bones in my feet, just above my arches. when i was growing and dancing as a kid they caused a lot pain and there was discussion of removing them surgically, but that never happened, so they’re still there. luckily they have not been an issue in a long time.
growing up i always knew i wanted to be a mother to boys and here i am today! what the odds of ones dream coming true! not sure if we should mess with the dream and try for third…
i am vegetarian and have been for years. it is purely for ethical reasons and sometimes i still crave red meat, even after ten years! what i wouldn’t do for some good, salty salami!
i am always looking for a deal, which goes hand-in-hand with my habit always looking for gifts for people. my eyes are always peeled for christmas gifts, birthday gifts, various upcoming events, and so i buy things when i see them, even if it’s 6 months in advance!
i have an enormous sweet tooth. i love chocolate, ice cream, baked goods and if they’re all in one bowl, all the better! i have passed this onto my youngest, my wee lion!

and, here are my list of nominations… you will notice a quick trend with the blogs that i read.

whatever: i have been reading meg’s blog for a couple of years now. she’s a crafting queen in kansas, with five kids! reading her blog is always very positive; she uses beautiful colours and photograph’s to share her stories and projects.
corner blog: i discovered tiffany’s blog about 6 months ago and have been faithfully reading it since. she is a mama from san-francisco, a part-time burlesque dancer, mother of two, and crafty lady with various projects on the go. her pictures are lovely and her “out of the box” ideas are fun to try at home… i have!
zach aboard: is another family blog, but this time it’s about a family of four living full-time on a sailing boat! how fantastic! cindy is a homeschooling, homesteading kinda mama of two, but because they live aboard, some of their daily routines are so different from ours, the land dwellers, so her entries are so interesting to read. cindy also takes beautiful photo’s capturing their aboard the catamaran they call home so perfectly.
bebe suisse: i stumbled upon this blog a few months ago via the NaBloPoMo’s we both participated in at BlogHer. elizabeth shares her struggles with infertility through her writing; her honesty is humbling and inspiring. her sense of humour is silly at times, as she explores some of the most mundane or adventurous aspects of her life, while living it up in switzerland.
lone home ranger: another mama blog about a mommy trying to do it all. justine is a self-proclaimed foodie and shares all sorts of yummy recipes on her blog. she also shares ways to eat locally, seasonally and how live more simply.
maine momma: i have been a fan of kristin’s blog for a while. her entries tend to be short, but they are beautifully written and always inspiring. kristin is a photographer and her pictures are real joy to look at, and also kinda intimidating. her eye is incredible.
my so called life and other lies: this blog comes straight from the UK, written by a mama who is trying to homeschool and homestead, among other things. debbie captures her life with beautiful photographs and blog posts describing recent family events and numerous sewing projects. this mama is a whiz with her needle and thread!
attack of the redneck mommy: this is an awesome canadian blog, written by tanis. she writes about the day to day stuff, but her story really pulls on the heartstrings. her sweet “bug”, her son, passed away and the pain that she struggles with in her life is very real. tanis is very funny and honest about her life, her pain, her kids and herself– no holds barred!
helmen talo: here is delightful finnish mama blog i follow. it’s about a family living in a small apartment in helsinki, finland. the pictures are lovely and depict finnish family life quite accurately, in my opinion.
loulou downtown: i want to quickly mention this IS NOT A MAMA BLOG. lou lou’s blog is like a diary capturing her life in toronto through written word and photography. i love looking at her photo’s and trying to guess where she’s been! her blog also makes me a little nostalgic for the city i used to call home.

ok, i am feeling a bit sad that i can’t come up with 15 blogs, but honestly, i don’t have the time to read and follow that many interesting lives. the blogs i do read, i do so faithfully and with loyalty.

that being said, i am thrilled to have been nominated and i hope you take the time to check out some of the blogs i listed above. i love to read about other people and how they live, or parent or whatever.

lazy days.

August 14, 2012 by mama lola

it’s funny how far our big trip already feels. we’ve only been home a few days!

we’ve been laying low at home, playing with our toys and trying to find a familiar routine again. the weather is wet, dark and gloomy outside, which is helping justify all our inside time. although, we have made time to see friends, everything has felt very low key, which is what this mama needs right about now. we all need to charge our batteries for the wedding this weekend; friday is the rehearsal at the church and then a dinner and saturday is the wedding. that’s a lot for my two guys. and me.

got my hair done today for the wedding. i dyed it the “OMBRE” way, which i just love, love, love. my version is a bit more subtle compared to some edgier peeps, but i do love it! i can’t remember the last time i dyed my hair professionally, shocking, eh? i took the plunge as i love my hairdresser and she gets my low-maintenance needs, and never pushes any products on me. she’s amazing!

kids up in bed for stories.
time to pull out the sewing machine and work on the wedding stuff. i will post pics when the bow ties and ring bearer pillows are done.

happy tuesday everyone!

recovering.

August 12, 2012 by mama lola

we’re home.
finally arrived yesterday just before dinner.
the last couple of days of our road trip were trying to say the least. the kids, especially bear was feeling fatigued. and i get it, so that’s why we got home slightly earlier than planned.

our two week summer roadtrip out to the maritimes was such an adventure and i am so glad we pushed through with such stamina. even when the chips were down with rough weather or fighting siblings in the back seat, we got through it! dear hubby was the coolest of us all, but that’s just the kinda guy he is and anyone who knows him won’t be surprised to hear that! two weeks of just the four of us, all day every day, was a bit demanding at times!

[ Quebec City, Quebec ]

the kids did better in some ways than i had expected, but they did throw some wicked, earth shaking tantrums when i least expected it, as well. the routine of our home life was completely dismantled on this trip, which is the nature of a roadtrip, but that left my two little boys scrambling for regularity at times. plus, throw in a time zone change of an hour and well, as many parents know, time changes can be very stressful for kids.
that being said, dear hubby and i are already planning our next trip! we will take the lessons we learned on this trip and move on new adventures. (i will actually make a detailed list of what i would change in an upcoming post.)

this was our first real holiday as a foursome and what a thrill it was to explore new parts of our vast land with my guys. it was such fun watching them help set up the tent or snuggle close every night as family. although the kids probably wont remember much of this trip. i will and so will dear hubby. for us this trip, was about being a family, being in the moment and being together. I must admit though, as much as camping was a lot of fun, I think next time we would definitely take a caravan with us instead just because it does make life a lot easier and supplies some much needed comfort when everyone just needs to unwind. I’ll be looking at Auto Finance Online to see what deals we can get on a caravan big enough for us all.

[ St. Andrew’s, Nova Scotia ]

today is sunday and we are hunkering down, getting back into the groove of things. the boys are wild with glee as they rediscover their toys and are reintroduced to books left at home. i have been super aggressive about getting our laundry done, and with five loads already washed, folded and put away i am now left with washing three sleeping bags. phew! it’s been kinda wild! dear hubby is airing out our stinky camping stuff and will tend to our tent as it so desperately needs a good soak! and, the car needs a supernclean too. we may just take it in to for a partial detailing, as there is a slight odour lingering. yuck.

[ Random beach on the Atlantic, Nova Scotia ]

i took about 1500 photo’s and feel rather overwhelmed at the thought of editing and sorting them! obviously many of them are not worth keeping or posting, but stay with me as i eventually organize the photo’s into slide shows or something.

and our house. sweet, sweet peppermint patty as we lovingly named her, stood waiting for us when we pulled in the driveay. we arrived to clean floors, cupboards and fresh sheets on the beds, all things i carefully did before our trip. and boy am i glad i did! my garden outside is a bit of a disaster, though. while we were away there was lotsa rain and the weeds have taken over, making the front look very wild and unkempt. I will have to get out there for a few hours and atleast try to tone down the jungle!

[ Peggy’s Cove, Nova Scotia ]

the list of things to do is growing, as we have busy week ahead. Bubba and Patty are getting married next saturday, so we are in full wedding mode now. We all have various responsibilities at the wedding and reception, so not only do we have to look fancy and clean, we have to have our ducks all lined up! Bubba and Patty have been getting their ducks lined up too for this wedding, they want to make sure they have everything done and dusted before the big day. I think they had recently been discussing a possibility of a prenuptial agreement, I’m not too sure, but I know they’ll go for a great law firm to help them walk through it. A friend recommended Family lawyers in Mayfair business – Peters and May as a suggestion, so we’ll see how that goes!

happy to be home.
happy to have watched the closing ceremonies of the london olympics.
happy to see friends tomorrow.
just happy.

this mama is tumour free!

July 5, 2012 by mama lola

i had my long awaited follow up in the big city with my neurosurgeon and endochronologist, about the tumour that was removed from my non-malignant pituitary gland 18 months ago. i have been symptom free, but i have been closely monitored, having MRI’s and blood work every six months. leading up to this last appointment the tension was building in my body with muscles tightening in my neck, shoulders and jaw. i have also been pretty tightly wound and have lost my cool faster and easier than usual, but it’s understandable, right? perhaps i am allowed to have some leeway.

anyhow, all is clear and my specialists gave us the all clear to have more babies, which is to say that now we can at least talk about it from the same perspective as other parents considering to grow their families. now, we don’t have to worry about another tumour growing, because the two are not related.
phew.
lion’s conception and the high risk pregnancy and the disastrous c-section that followed were all an unfortunate coincidence indirectly connected to the tumour. but, even though the process of getting our sweet, spunky lion here was so stressful, his presence has made our family so much brighter and fuller.

[ yesterday was hottest day EVER, so after the docs dear hubby and i walked around some cute areas of town. got some fancy smoothies to help cool down. yum!]

which brings me to, my littlest guy is turning two on the 8th of july, which is sunday. and although his birthday brings with it upsetting memories of his birth and week hospital stay, i feel incredibly fortunate that we are able to celebrate two wonderful, healthy years of him. his personality and character are so passionate and spunky, he really is meant to be here with us, even if he was a surprise.
i love him so deeply.

i will post more about him, his birthday and where my emotions fit in with it all.

went for a celebratory drinks and dinner double-date with our dear friends in the big city. it was the hottest day ever, but who notices the dripping sweat when your among good friends! we had such a lovely time sans kids, which is something we never do. it was refreshing and allowed our friends to maintain the nasty habit they rediscovered a few weeks ago on their trip to the amalfi coast in italy. yuck!

my lovely, dear friend has big birthday coming up.

love her so!

it’s a busy, busy few days with prep for various parties.

loving the busy, fun, happy summer thus far!

cottage.

July 3, 2012 by mama lola

we spent a glorious weekend swimming and soaking up the sun up at the cottage this past weekend. it was such fun; the boys love it up there surrounded by trees, nature and peace.

we cottaged.

we swam.

we savoured.

we played.

we ate.

we spent time with family.

we made decorations for canada day.

we enjoyed simplicity.

i tried to relax and enjoy, but i was distracted. i have another follow up in the big city with my neurologist and endochronologist this week. the tension has caused great pain in my neck and the top of my spine. fingers crossed my MRI and bloodwork from a few weeks ago are all clear and i that i continue to be tumour free. i hate to worry. i hate tumours.

my garden.

June 28, 2012 by mama lola

my dream has always been to have my own garden. when we moved into our house, i was so excited about the prospect of being outside and digging in the dirt, that i completely forgot in those fantasies that i was about seven months pregnant! in those days i was consistently exhausted from being pregnant, chasing after a two year old bear and living with the tumour on my pituitary gland. any one of those circumstances alone is tiresome, but triple the effect and it’s kinda amazing that even got out of bed daily!

so, to my shame and shagrim our garden was a disaster. my parents would visit, and within an hour or so my mom would be out there trying to make sense of the weeds. it was embarrassing. we didn’t have any of the right tools for maintenance either. check out the grass in the second picture; dear hubby would try to cut it with scissors! oh, boy!

but, we’ve come a long way baby. the wildflower seeds that we threw into the yard have taken and now after a few years, they are growing beautifully and continue to seed more and more of the garden. i love them. their bold colours are so summery. my perennials are thriving and things are finally taking shape. we did cut down some trees on our property as they were leaning but we have replanted them. i didnt realise how long it would take to cut down trees on your property as it did take a couple of days but im glad its all sorted now. with this being said, as it did take a lot of time, if we had used the services of a tree surgeon, this job would have probably been done a lot better, a lot faster and would have saved us a lot of time. but at least we know for next time. when you take care of your garden, you realise how much time actually needs to go into it to get the look you are going for. saying that though, if you do want to give your garden a makeover, but are not sure where to start, getting in touch with companies who provide something similar to a Gresham Landscape Maintenance Service for example, could be something worth looking into, especially if improving your garden has been something you’ve been putting off.

this week my succulents are exploding with flowers.

the kids made some decorations for our porch (can you spot them?) and then ate apples!
check out their cute new hair do’s too!

it’s getting hot, hot, hot again here.

come find me and follow me on twitter (@bearandlionmama).

the finn in me!

June 12, 2012 by mama lola

helsinki is the world design capital for 2012.

check out THIS link for all the beautiful details. looking at the pictures from helsinki make me incredibly homesick, so much so i feel a big ol’ ache in my heart for my homeland. i was born there and spent my childhood there romping through the forests.

check out these AMAZING BLOCKS by Kokoroi & Moi.

each block represents an important and historic landmarks in helsinki. i just love the simplicity of them and the colours. so lovely, so finnish!

who will buy these for my kids?

last day of may :: watch out, it’s a vent.

June 1, 2012 by mama lola

augh. rude people in high(ish) places really get under my skin.
as you may remember last week, i thought i had lost my requisitions for my upcoming follow up MRI and blood work, that had been ordered six months ago by my neurologist and endochronologist. (if you are new here, i had a brain tumour a couple of years ago… see HERE and HERE for details). well, fortunately i did eventually find the requisition’s in the basement in last years day planner! i have already done my bloodwork and am waiting to hear back from the hospital to see when my MRI is.
before finding the forms, i called my neurologists office to see what my options were. first they hung up on me, and then one of the other receptionists was so rude to me, i actually burst into tears when i hung-up with her. bear came running in asking what the matter was. i phoned dear hubby, who got all mad at the system, as usual. anyhow, long story short my endo has a different office and receptionist, who phoned me back and was kind and generous with her time and help. luckily, i didn’t end up needing anyone’s extra help as i found the forms and have taken care of everything i can.

[ this is where the vent comes in ]… so today, i come home from picking up bear from preschool and the rude receptionist from my neuro’s office has left a long message telling me, there’s nothing she can do really and that next time i just shouldn’t lose the forms. she keeps calling me “mah dear” and uses an offensive tone of: sucks-to-be-you-but-i’m-not-gonna-try-an-help-you kinda way. she complained that i didn’t leave a fax number with her, blah, blah, blah she was calling me back and i wasn’t even home! she asked me to phone her back (since she’s obviously going out of her way to help me), but didn’t leave her number. sigh. i phoned her back and left a message three minutes after i received her message, and told her everything was taken care of and i would see her in july for my appointment. three hours later dear hubby phones saying she has now phoned his cell, complaining about my ineptness.
oh, boy!

people like her hold a lot of power, she could lose a file, misplace a date and nobody would know any different.

*****
moving on…
today is the last day of NaBloPoMo, meaning i will no longer be blogging daily. i missed a few days this month, but still i’m amazed at how often i can get to the computer. some days are easier to write about than others.

no pictures today. too tired to edit.

hope you stay on and keep checking in!
*****

group support.

May 23, 2012 by mama lola

i know i said i would fill you in on the brain tumour support group sooner, but truth be told, i had some processing to do. it was a heavy two hours.

because, the meeting was held on the monday of a long weekend, there was a small group of us. the group included tumour survivors, parents of kids living with tumours, partners of survivors and two facilitators. it was hard to hear from the mix of people, as their perspectives and situations are so different from mine. hard, because we’re talking brain tumours. sometimes cancerous.
as with anything, no two brain tumour experiences are the same.

listening to the honest accounts of the heartaches others are living with was heavy to hear. it was impossible not to take these stories and package them tightly and slip them into my heart. there they sit, not because i feel pity, but because i finally do not feel completely alone on this road. although, nobody else at the group was pregnant when they were diagnosed, or had any of the complications we endured from my tumour, but it’s not about the specifics that matter, it’s about having something that unites us: BRAIN TUMOURS.

it sounds depressing to say that, but i actually feel comforted. all this time i had no one really to unburden my reality to; yes, i have amazing friends who have always provided shoulders to cry on and have listened to the myriad of anxieties i have felt, but i’m always worried people are sick of hearing about the tumour. especially now that my tumour is gone and i’m feeling so much better. although i feel great physically, emotionally i am still quite shaky at times. every little twinge or pain anywhere in or on my head instantly has me worried the tumour has grown back. if i feel particularly tired or extremely hungry i wonder if the tumour is back.
when i look at my lion i am reminded of the tumour. of his frightening birth.
feel the stress.
the worry sits there.
always.
and it’s heavy.
these are the things that are hard to share with my friends and family. now, i feel fortunate to have this group to shed some of my worries with.

[ from HERE. ]

today i stressed about MRI and blood work requisitions being lost. i was made to feel like a complete loser by a receptionist, but in my own defence i received these papers 6 months ago. anyhow, i did eventually find them in the basement, in last years day planner!
phew! close one.
see, tumour stress is always on my radar for some reason or another!

happy hump day folks!
what stressed you out today?